The Matt Lisac Thing.

The staple is a practical bit of magic that almost anyone can use.  The machine called “Stapler” acts as the staple enabler.  That’s how the stapler got its name: staple(enable)r.  The staple’r was invented in 1767 by a young Turk from Hungary named Alfred von Lastname.  He found that if you tied a string of solid lead  through the holes in several papers, you cured the headache of organizing papers, but also caused the headache of lead poisoning.  Hence the need for the stapler.  The staple uses friction and gravity to “hold” several “sheets” of paper together.  You cannot put a staple in the middle of a page because of Newton’s Seventh Law of Stationary.  Staples come in a variety of sizes, but mostly people just use “standard staple” size, because of a government mandate in the Reagan years.